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  • welcome to the hole

    welcome to the hole

    Once upon a time, I kept a LiveJournal account, gryphons_hole, a deep, dark, comfy little hole in my brain where I kept notes on my life and queerness.

    This is the archive to that account, mostly password protected, adult, queer content, stripped of photo content after the site restructured its photo hosting feature. I hope to restore that content as well.

    If I know you, ask for the password. If I don’t, hope for a generous mood.

    08.18.24 I have realized a need to continue in this space. A kink reawaking if you will, with content that may range into inappropriate for my other blog spaces.

  • Protected: gst

    Protected: gst

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  • Protected: a-shirt alliteration day

    Protected: a-shirt alliteration day

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  • creepy dream

    I am up even earlier, being on a 5 am start for the rest of the week to catch up for machine down time last week.I woke up an hour before my alarm due to an unnerving dream.

    Vampires. Ugh. The entire world was being over-run by them. This wasn’t exactly a vampire hunter gig, more like, just trying to not be turned thing. Ick. I dodged being bite right up until I awoke. I had a friend left with me that was also safe, but he was a hero-guy of sorts; he seemed to have various abilities, like flight and/or levitation. (I think at one point, he pulled a werewolf number…) Somehow, he had immunity from the vampires, not that he couldn’t be turned, more like it was forbidden. I think they were afraid of him becoming more powerful.

    I was pretty much the damsel in distress. Ugh. Really…? I played the HIV card to dodge being turned. I agreed to a taste-test; no biting. I cut my hand and some chick-vampire stepped up to be the guinea pig. She offered a critique much like you would expect at a wine testing. Very odd. All hell started breaking loose when she determined that it was a bit odd, but safe… and really rather unique.

    Ugh.

    Here’s the thing. I detest vampires. It is a near-offense concept to me. I have no love or draw to the genre or the subject matter. The only time I like those sorts of stories is when there is a focus on the hunter character, like Van Helsing and similar. They are simply another form of an undead thing, and I find it a disgusting warp of nature. (And the whole zombie thing… Ugh, really. I just find the concept of brainless hordes of undead a too-easy analogy to the world. Something more complex, please…)

    Needless to say, falling back to sleep was marred, I only just dozed for the hour before the alarm.

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  • draco_kc asks…

    Q: You have the opportunity to host a dinner party for up to five other people who lived at any time in world history, with language being no barrier. Whom do you invite, and why?

    A: I have been sitting on this one for most of the month, with one seat left open at the table until today.

    St. Francis of Assisi, Isadora Duncan, Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec and Cole Porter have been on the guest list since the question was asked. I am not exactly sure when the fifth space was so difficult to fill.

    St. Francis may be the odd man out in this bunch, but he was first on the list. I have been fascinated with the saint since some time ago in college. A friend had drawn parallels between the mythos of this saint and the archetype of a pagan high priest. It wasn’t the first time someone had reference the idea of pagan priests overlapping with the Catholic clergy. I am at least a bit interested in this idea; the penultimate ‘hiding in plain sight’…

    Isadora Duncan makes the list simply for the ironic tragedy of her death. Okay, maybe not just for that… such a woman. I mean, really, how many people are personally responsible for the creation of new and unique art forms…?

    Henri da Toulouse-Lautrec. Well… what dinner party would I host that wasn’t at least a certain bit tawdry…? Really! He would be a perfect addition, I think, especially if I had the bar fully stocked!

    Cole Porter. If he was in life anything as he was portrayed in De-Lovely, well! How could any dinner party be anything without him…? Charming, delightful, inspiring… and queer! Not to be missed.

    So that brings us to the final spot. She was the first potential add-on and for some reason, I never fully sealed the idea, until today.

    The final seat at my dinner table would be for Annie Lennox. Seriously. I was roaming around YouTube today, looking for various tunes of hers… and I fell across this: she does a video blog series on her YouTube page, including a series of questions from her fans. That is pretty sweet, I think. And then… well, her voice. Her power. Her presence. She is stellar. And her refusal to cave to the powers-that-be and their insistence that a woman need to forever struggle with being cut and poked and stretched to be beautiful, well, makes her even more beautiful in my world.

    On top of that, have you ever heard her sing Cole Porter’s music…? Holy crap.

    In all, I think it would be a fascinating celebration of life and love.

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    March is Question Month; ask you question here.

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  • huh.

    Do you remember that huge snow storm a month or so ago… Of course, you do. The one that seemed to hit every freakin’ state in the union except for Missouri…? Yeah, that one.

    Let’s just call it a late arrival.

    I mean, really, it caught me so completely off guard, seeing that the weatherfolk actually predicted it.

    Not used to that at all…

  • photo challenge – landmark

    My landmark entry is offered with some irony:

    The Forrester Viaduct is a notorious landmark of sorts in the West Bottoms of KCMO. It is the only by-pass for the train tracks on the Missouri side of the bottoms and was previously known to be the single worse strip of road in the state reputed to have the worst roads in the continuous states…

    A month ago, a road crew began tearing off the old concrete and pavement and will rebuild the viaduct on it’s remaining infrastructure. It will likely be a three year project. The image above shows the beginning infrastructure at the opening mouth of the by-pass. The new one will extend two more lots closer to me building, which was four lots over my shoulder when I took the shot.

    If I don’t miss the daily 6:30am train, I will lose five to ten minutes everyday on the way into work for the next three years.

    *sigh*

    I look forward to the new viaduct.

    *cross-posted*

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  • my dad will only ever have one knee

    And that reality isn’t about to change.

    I spoke to my mother the other day. Dad will not be getting his second knee. Ever. Between the poor handling at the first rehab center and the extra surgeries and the infections, there is not enough muscle and tissue to cover the implant and keep it safe and functioning. If he goes through the next two or three weeks without any new infections, they will go back in, once again and fuse the knee joint in his left leg.

    Having spent most of the past two years in bed, he no longer has the body strength that will be required to move about with only one knee, but then that would be his challenge to date, wouldn’t it…? He has his work cut out for him; he needs to regain upper body strength and some flexibility or he won’t be getting around much at all.

    As it stands, I am pretty numb about the whole to-do. Either it has yet to sink in, or I can only be angry about his mismanagement of his own health for so long before I simply have to let go… I love him, but at some point he needs to see that his bad choices have created all of this…

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